Wednesday, March 12, 2008
{ 12:37 AM }
orhhh g0sHh
my throat is in pain
n i have been feeling feverish for the past few days ..
for the last 2 weeks
i've been having
dance prac : 9am to 6pm
cheer : 6pm to 9pm
weekends : dance 9am to 10pm
every single day
totally no rest off for me
im totally v tired
coz i have been rushing here n there
by the time cheer training starts
after 30 mins i am already drained off
but i have no choice
i have to endure
i dun really show my actual tiredness during training
how my whole body is aching
how i am trying to recall my position/stunts
coz there are jus so many things on my mind
my hungry stomach
coz at times i dun really have the time to eat
a proper meal
tat is y i feel so giddy
n it get worst
when u're having a bad day
when things doesnt go right the whole day
n e feeling of
disappointment when u're not selected for e routine
disappointment when there is a need to change to a whole new routine
disappointment when stunts didnt went up
n it will jus demoralise me even more
n when u c those unhappy faces when it didnt turn out right
jus pulled me down even further
freaking furious when some ppl jus got on ur nerves
n when ppl dun take it seriously in their task
at times, i jus want to give up half way
n when ryan/gin said
rem the time when u decide to join the team
wat is in ur mind ..??
glamour ..? passion ..? to show off ..?
suddenly all those flashback came to my mind
how i wanted badly to be part of the team
how nervously i was when the results are out
whether i was selected or not
so now, here i am
being a part of my first dance concert n
cheerobics 2008
:)
n i noe i deserve to be in the team
n as for dance
i make sure i will fight for my place
the day uncle sam
played the mind theory wif us
flashing back the first day we stepped into the team
until where we are now
i dunno y
but i feel like breaking down
there really is tears in my eyes
n my mind jus qstn me
y do u decide to be in the team?
there really aren't much time left
wed n thurs - full dress dance rehearsal
thurs - full dress cheer rehearsal
n i totally
i need to gain back my confidence
so like wat Uncle Sam said
'Smile, tats where u will gain ur confidence'
n i now wat he said is true
i will break through
n enjoy myself
jiayou!!
